There’s a Better Way to Think About “Managing Up”

On "Managing Up": Brave Ownership and Humble Ownership

I had lunch recently with one of my former business partners who had just recently accepted a new leadership role as Regional Sales Manager for an MSP.  Over lunch, he told me he had been reading Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin.

If you're unfamiliar with it, the central premise is simple: leaders should take ownership for outcomes rather than making excuses, blaming circumstances, or waiting for someone else to solve problems.

My friend naturally has an ownership mentality. It's one of the qualities I most admire about him and one that fits well within the culture of his new company. But after only a month in the role, he found himself wrestling with an important question:

"How much should I push my ideas upward when I'm still so new?"

After reflecting on it, I summarized my advice into two simple principles:

Within your area of legitimate authority, be brave with your ownership.

Outside your area of authority, practice humble ownership.

Those two ideas are not contradictory. In fact, I believe they complement one another.

Within your own sphere of responsibility, leaders should act with confidence. They should take initiative, solve problems, make decisions, and accept accountability for the outcomes. Great leaders are not continually asking permission to do the work they have already been entrusted to do.

The same principle extends beyond formal authority into areas of legitimate influence. If you are part of a leadership team, for example, you have both the opportunity and the responsibility to contribute boldly to that team's decisions.

Outside those boundaries, however, ownership should become more humble.

Not weaker.

Not passive.

Simply more humble.

Why?

First, because you don't know what you don't know. Senior leaders almost always possess context that is invisible from lower levels of the organization. Information, constraints, risks, relationships, and strategic considerations that have not yet been shared may dramatically change the nature of a decision. Humility acknowledges that unseen context often exists.

Second, the farther one moves up an organization, the greater the scope of responsibility—and the greater the consequences of getting decisions wrong. When you "manage up," you are often asking someone else to assume risks for which they—not you—will ultimately be held accountable.

That reality should shape not only what we recommend but how we recommend it.

Practically speaking, I suggested several disciplines.  Several of these ideas also appear in slightly different form in my forthcoming book, Quiet Power: Leading Everyone, Everywhere, All At Once, where we explore how leaders exercise influence both through referent power and through systems leadership:

• Practice careful nemawashi (a Japanese term meaning "preparing the ground"). Before bringing forward significant proposals, invest time in respectful one-on-one conversations to understand concerns, gather perspectives, and build support. The goal isn't to manipulate outcomes—it is to improve ideas before they reach the decision table.

• When participating in group decisions, follow a disciplined process that encourages open disagreement, careful evaluation of evidence, and unified commitment once a decision has been reached. (I describe what I call the Ideal Decision-Making Protocol in my forthcoming book, Quiet Power.)

• Respect the chain of command whenever possible. Avoid bypassing intermediate leaders unless extraordinary circumstances truly warrant it.

• Bring evidence rather than opinions. Opinions invite debate. Evidence demands consideration.

• Seek first to understand the constraints your leaders are navigating before trying to change their conclusions. Good questions often produce better dialogue than strong assertions.

Practiced together, these habits allow leaders to exercise ownership in every direction.

Within their own responsibilities, they lead courageously.

Outside those responsibilities, they influence thoughtfully, respectfully, and as a good steward of the trust you've been given.

Leadership isn't simply about taking ownership—it is about expressing ownership wisely.

Sometimes leadership calls us to act boldly within our areas of responsibility. At other times it calls us to influence patiently, respectfully, and with humility. Learning the difference may be one of the most valuable leadership skills we ever develop.

Several of these ideas are explored more fully in my forthcoming book, Quiet Power: Leading Everyone, Everywhere, All At Once.